“I don't think it ever goes away,” Joann says. “And even when your children are grown up, you still have working mother guilt. But you know what? It's not a very useful use of your energy.”
According to the Cleveland Clinic, working mom guilt leads to stress, and that stress can cause a number of physical and mental health issues, including anxiety, depression, increased blood pressure, and increased heart rate.
So how do we cope with the guilt?
Stay present and positive during family time
Joann says that looking at your circumstances through a “glass half-full approach” can work wonders on your perspective.
For instance, you may feel frustration about sitting down to dinner later than you’d anticipated, but try to switch your attention to feeling present and grateful.
She says, “Rather than wringing your hands…celebrate the fact it's a weeknight, and you're actually having dinner with the people that you love the most in the world.”
Schedule time for self-care
“Another way that I learned to cope with working mother guilt is I came to recognize the importance of self-care,” says Joann.
While this may seem counterproductive, carving out time for self-care allows you to release stress in a healthy way.
The Cleveland Clinic describes self-care as an “opportunity to fill up your energy bank and lower your stress,” which ultimately helps you function better and reduces feelings of resentment.
Create positive memories for your children through quality time
Be intentional with your time off.
“The other thing that I found really useful when we moved to London,” Joann shares, “was that every year when my kids had spring break, I took a vacation day with each child, and it was their mommy day.”
When you create these moments, not only do you ditch the guilt and stress, you create lasting positive memories for you and your family.
To hear more from Joann, listen to her full conversation with Priya and Paul on The Work-Life Equation podcast.
